Start a Band… Not a Rock band.

Gather round the soft glow of your computer screens children, it’s time for another trip into the mind of Gregory Rees Olsen III.

Recently while browsing the ‘World Wide Web’ I came across something that kind of made me angry – no, not the comments section on KSL.com (or even KSL.com frankly…), it was a Face Book update that someone had posted. For your convenience I have typed the text below…

[Name removed] Just took first place in the Guitar Hero tournament!

For those of you who don’t know what this is referring to, there has been a recent rash of video games based (loosely) on ‘Rock and Roll’ instruments (See below).

This was a novel idea that came out several years ago, but has taken on a life of its own. You can’t turn your cart in Wal-Mart without hitting a display full of Rock-Band, or Guitar Hero sets (that is assuming you can turn your cart around in Wal-Mart anyway, but that is a different Blog post).
The makers of these games would like you to think that by playing this game, not only will you have that Faux-hawk you have always wanted, but you will be rad and have awesome band practices with awesome people.

Unfortunatly the sad reality of it is that most people look like lifeless schmucks while indulging in these games.

I will admit that I have indulged in these types of games in the past, something I am not proud of yet something I cannot escape… but I digress. The problem here is that children of all ages, and yes even some adults, have devoted countless hours to developing ‘Bitchin’ Guitar Hero skillz’ but haven’t the foggiest idea how to play [gasp] an actual guitar! So my message to the world is this: put down your plastic instruments and gather ‘round the real thing! In the words of Brad Paisley “Guitar Band never got anybody a date!” There was a day when Wal-Mart was filled with Mullets and cheap, but real Guitars; I hope to see such a day again. For your sake – no, for your children sake, buy a guitar (or Banjo) and learn to play the real thing. No one ever made it big by playing Donkey Kong (well, except that one guy).